From the pages of History - III

A, I and M frequented McDonalds to escape the cafeteria food. Which perhaps gives you some idea of what office food was all about. They tell each other that chicken is high in protein and fish is healthy, but deep down they know the prime reason for their presence under the golden arches are the value meal toys. And the coke float.

A little background info:

Every time they entered, they were immediately confronted with a difficult choice. A Value Meal was Burger + Medium Fries + Medium Coke, while a Happy Meal substituted a toy for the Fries. How that is 'happy', only the marketing people can explain, but nevertheless, a joint decision was sometimes made to sacrifice one order of fries based on the toys on offer and whether they were worthy of joining the collection.

So they stood in queue, all the while trying to decide on something from the staggering choice of 5 burgers, occasionally letting the odd awkward teen-couple-on-first-date past when the register came too close. At the final corner, before the long start-finish straight, this bit of information was presented.

Medium Coke22
Coke Float20
Cold Coffee35

Which was encouraging, considering M could not down even one Medium Coke without complaining. (Though A had witnessed him down 3 vodka sprites, two tequila shots and sing She fü¢king hates me at the top of his voice, he isn't one to judge.) Plus, a little bit of ice cream, for a little less money, that was a no brainer in their fast food world.

At the register, events unfolded as ...

I:3 value meals, 1 chicken, 2 fish.
McEmployee:Anything else, Sir?
A:Ohh yes! Can you substitute the cokes with coke floats?
McEmployee:No Sir, I'm afraid we can't do that.
A:What do you mean, you can't?
McEmployee:Sir, that option is not present in the system.
M:What has the system got to do with it. Just give us 3 coke floats.
McEmployee:Sir, I can't do that.
M:Why not?
McEmployee:Sir, the system won't accept it. If you want a cold coffee, I can do that.
M:Exactly! So just like that, give us coke floats.
McEmployee:Sir I can only substitute a higher value.
A:What the hell kind of logic is that! Look, keep the two bucks ok. Just give us coke floats.
McEmployee:Can't do that Sir.
M:Does the ice cream machine keep track of how many you have dispensed and tally them against the billing?
A:Yes! Suppose there was a wrong flavour ordered by mistake. You would just chuck it, right?
M:Are you under surveillance to ensure you don't give coke floats?
McEmployee:Do you want to talk to the Manager?
McManager:Sir, we cannot substitute a lower value in the order.
M:And what is the logic in that?
McManager:Sir, we don't decide that. Its how the system is configured.
A:But don't do anything with the order!! why can't you give us coke floats and bill it as cokes!!
McManager:Can't do that, sorry.
M:What are you all of a sudden? Honest!
A:Thats it!! We are never coming here again!
I:Actually, I quite like it here.
M:Me too.
I:You have our order.
McEmployee:Yes Sir, Coming right up.

Disclaimer: Its been a while. Some facts may have been substituted by fiction.


mak said...

you guys had the perfect logic, it seems. why didn't you pursue them everytime you went to McD's? :P

and i completely support M here. softdrinks are too cold, you have to have 'warm' stuff in that to make them drinkable...

Akshay said...

'you guys'!! ..
a case of pot calling the kettle black, no?

mak said...

chk! i thought we are keeping the names secret [:P]

Akshay said...

the names *are* secret! no one knows who the people in the story are ... and no one ever will .. [;)]

Manasi said...

errrm.. reality check guys.. EVERYONE knows who the people in the story are!!

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