Open Letter

Dear Toilet Cleaner Manufacturers,

You really spare no expense or creativity to come up with some of the best advertisements on Indian television. I mean, showing before and after shots of a (once) dirty toilet is sheer genius. Then there are those with your host visiting said dirty toilet's home with camera crew and getting reactions from satisfied customers. That is sheer genius with a cherry on top.

But hear me out here. How about not playing those ads on prime time TV, say between 8pm-10pm, because, you know, most people have dinner during that time. I don't know about you, but the sight of a dirty loo just as I am about to shove the next tasty morsel into my mouth unnerves me a bit. I mean, I know where all that rajma is going to end up eventually, but I'd rather not think about it right now.

How many customers do you think you gain by this? I certainly will never even consider picking up your product when I am in the market. You spoil my dinner, I don't buy your stuff. Simple.

So here's an idea. Pull those ads. Instead allocate that budget to 'adopting' the toilets on the Railway Station, Bus Stand, etc. Feel free to display your wares, slap your posters all over the place. But keep them as clean as the 'after' pictures in your ads. That would create a positive impression and people would appreciate it. And next time I go to the store, I would remember to buy your brand.





If you believe in one true god then you don't believe in all the thousands of gods that have gone before, roman gods, greek gods, norse gods, mayan gods, egyptian gods etc. I agree with you. I don't believe in any of those gods either. I'll just go one small logical step further and not believe in your god either.

Point is, you should be trying to be a good person, which basically comes down to a lifelong Hippocratic Oath of "first do no harm". Every ethical position comes about naturally from that. And according to JC in the New Testament, it doesn't matter who we pray to - the good guys get to Heaven anyway, and the bad guys don't. The humanists and atheists are at an advantage here, because they can consider "first do no harm" without the laborious framework of how to do no harm which has built up historically around every religion - the utterly unholy Catholic doctrine of "every sperm is sacred", for example, which has no basis in the teachings of JC.

So it's the reverse of Pascal's Wager. Blaise Pascal reckoned that you should go to church regardless of whether you believed or not, because if the Christians were right then it'd get you to Heaven, and if the Christians were wrong then you'd not lost anything. But according to JC it's the other way around - you'll get to Heaven whether you follow a religion or not, so long as you behave well. And if there isn't a Heaven, you've still led a good life which has generally improved the world as a whole (even if only in a small way).

Besides which, there's a deeper point. Unless your god bases its decisions about an afterlife on the way you actually act, and the reasons you act that way, that god isn't worthy of worship. And if it does (cf. Christianity, Judaism and Islam), then it's handling admission to Hell, not Heaven.

Saw this while going through the above article.
Exactly my position.
Just be a good person.
Who cares if you say your morning prayers or don't.


Dhak Dhak, Groan

Apparently Hero Honda sold another bajillion bikes and made record amounts of cash, bucking industry trends, recession, yada yada ..

But having loads of cash and throwing it by the gunny sackful at an ad agency gets you this ..

Wow! S-P-E-C-I-A-L E-F-F-E-C-T-S!

But Seriously, Wtf!

Hrithik Roshan is not in any way Moses ... and the SFX looks like those leftover reels from the Shaktimaan editing floor found a new home.

And yes, adding huge amounts plastic cladding to a piddling 150cc engine is like stuffing your underwear with a sock. Looks very impressive but when needed the most, you come up short.

Maybe they should stop making ads altogether. We all know people will still be buying a 'Passion++ Pro+++' a hundred years from now and it will still be a best seller. So why bother. Save that cash, add it to the balance sheet. But yes, deduct Rs. 15 for a shave, for Mr. Roshan.

Wide Load

So I found this in one of my Site Meter visit logs...

That, is an unbelievably wide screen, but running 16bit colour would be a letdown.


Is that your zoom lens or are you just happy to see me?

After a long hiatus, and some dithering about, the FZ18 is back where it belongs - with me.

Hopefully, the output will be worth the wait ..


What would I do?

Reminds me of a rather special someone ...



Space - The Final Frontier

They , howeverwilllearntoinsertanextraspacebetweenacommaanditsprecedingword.


Smokin Joe's

It started as an attempt to rhyme toes with rose, immediately moved on to Joe's, and apparently, we set the proverbial ball rolling because this is what followed..

foes / chose / grows / pose / lows / joe's / nose / woes / rose

how would that one go??

Dinner at Smokin' Joe's
was the start of our woes
how I wish we chose
someplace else, but - who knows

Dinner last night was at Smokin' Joe's
i love the way he strikes a pose
a cowboy hat, beware oh foes
and a thick black stache under his nose!

So we decide on smokin joe's
and the place is not even close
but there she was with her button nose
she smiled at me and my heart beat rose

Last winter we went to smokin joe's
the heat was out and the cold winds rose
we waited there with curled up toes
who ate our pizza - god only knows!

There was an itch between my toes
and that was the least of my woes
'cause when I went to Smokin Joe's
some of that chilli went up my nose

I was racking my brains to write a small prose
sitting by the window, watching the blooming rose
i crossed my legs and scratched my nose
thats it! i'm getting a pizza from smokin joe's!

I had a date at Smokin Joe's
But my best friend said, bros before 'hos
In love and war, I said, anything goes
Looking at the bill, I'm glad its her I chose

I saw this lil boy at smokin joe's
he looked all tattered and picked his nose
but when the pizza was served, in the air he rose
hell! that's the voodoo boy! - i simply froze!

Sitting outside Smokin Joes
We were besieged by hungry crows
I nudged the nearest with my toes
With a rude stare, the whole flock rose ...

(digressed into a discussion on ghosts -> david copperfield -> mediums -> shorts which are no longer medium)

We were making up verses about smokin joe's
but we gradually digressed to shorts - why? god knows
in the end, 'size does matter' is the tag line he chose
stop talking about pizza dude and shed some of those kilos!

(a long time later..)

i'm at my wits' end, as the day narrows
writing the report is adding to my woes
going through this hell, is not something i chose
how i wish singapore had a smokin joe's

The day has highs, then there are lows
I know you are bored, it really shows
Not hell, just one more of the chores
Finish it off and we won't talk of those ..

*The End*


The End

Conclusion and Epilogue:

To sum it up, Sony tried to push me into buying a new camera. Previous experience, here and here.

After showing them the finger, I gave it to a dinky small time camera shop figuring I had nothing to lose. So a couple of missed connections and a weeks delay, I finally got it back. Cost me 1800 for replacing the DC-DC converter.

Test 1: Put in approximately 80% charged 1900mAh and left it on in video mode. Lasted 1 hour 21 minutes till the battery ran out. I think that is a pass.

Later, I got a call from Sony about the feedback form I had filled in while collecting it. Apparently they wanted to know why I had marked most of the fields '0' and 'Poor'. I explained to the lady that when I take my vehicle to the service center and complain of low mileage, they don't recommend that I change the engine.
I think she got it.


Aaaand Good Morning!

How could I let this go ...


Goood Night!

Well, its 9:30 and I was late by a few minutes...
So, here goes.

You know who you are ..


Friends like these ...

Manasi Dhavale wrote:


akshay panday wrote:

isharoon se baat karna mujhe nahi ata

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Seekho na, Naino ki bhasha piya...

akshay panday wrote:

tumhare nainon mein jhankne par to hum hosh kho baithte hai ...
bhaasha to door, hum apna naam tak bhool jaate hai

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Corny dialog from where?

akshay panday wrote:

what the hell ..
i made it up ..

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Aap ki hindi itni aachhi kab se ho gayi?
And so romantic! Ooh la la!
Main toh apne hosh kho baithi. ;)

akshay panday wrote:

humne na likhe hote to ye shabd 'corny'
lekin sach janane par ho gaye 'romantic' .. ?
tumse ye sab kehna samay ki barbadi hai ...
kya jaano tum, chand shabdo mein kitni badi kahani hai ...

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Hum kshama chaahte hai.
Humne aapka dil dukhaaya hai.
Humein maaf kijiye.
Humein yakeen nahi ho raha tha ki aap itna kuch mehsoos kartein hain.
Humein aapke dil ki baat samajhne mein der lag gayi.

akshay panday wrote:

kshama maangna asaan hai, kamaana bada mushkil
maaf shabdo se kar doonga, lekin kya maaf karega ye dil
hume toote hue dil ka mareez bana diya hai aapne
iss majrooh jigar ko na milega marham sapne mein

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Humein aapka dil kadaapi na dukhaana tha.
Hum aapke toote dil pe marham lagaayenge..
Aap nischint rahiye. :-)

akshay panday wrote:

ye sab kehna kitna aasan hai
lekin kabhi nibhake to dikhao
toote dil ka marham chhodiye
bas humara BBQ lautao ...

Manasi Dhavale wrote:

Aap maangke toh dekhiye. Turant de doongi.

akshay panday wrote:

dus mahine aapke paas jo pada hai
humne kitni baar vapas maanga tha
lekin aap hai ki roj naya bahana
turant ka matlab aapse shayad hai anjaana

Happily never after ...

Obviously, the nerds who designed the algorithm are irony impaired...